Looking Glass

This is a music video project of mine from 2005. Look for me, I'm the third.

green, red, black, white
jumble of gears and spokes
bikes convalescing at the corner

the gray footsteps of hundreds
fast, slow, hurt, hopeful
flowing the street in front of me

how could i deign to know
the meaning of all the echoes
rattling tumbling in my mind

i cling, harder now
to the only truths i know
constantly dying, constantly renewing

to fight or to lay down
to wish or to act
to choose myself, or someone else

as the tires turn
as the footsteps collect
as my mind turns over and over

this is all there is
the venal muse
spent at last

2 years

and all the days to come
is what is she said
and not what was
will ever win

yet what of the slides
and rides and rambles
in williamsburg fair
shall not be writ for to see?

not for all the noise and snow
and water lapping
at the nautilus of brooklyn
should i forget thee

at long last i will not fail
to gaze where we launched
a thousand hearts in the night
by the starspray of our own fire

these numbers will repeat
2-1-2 heartbeat
books, whiskey, rooftops
-all fleeting

a moment a dream
a flick of a bic
your memory an extender
a half-life longer than mine

for kristina, wherever i may find her

humans forget
in order to survive
but i have lived
because of her
blond memory

she walked
in clicks
down the hall
in jeans and heels
with perfect eyes

she recruited me
to needles and thread
and introduced me
to jesus - what else!
(her tape measure)

how could i ever forget
the last conversation
and then - but a hundred
yards away where the sun
had crumpled her in the road

her future was bright,
so brighter than mine
the black armband
the lost piece
the constant in my mind

i lived to be here for her
so many times
i chose to live
there are no words
for what she is owed

beautiful idle

he puts me in the mood to swing
languorously from the window
idly smoking
and pondering the greenery
below

life in celluloid

you run your hands over me
the gold web of my heart opens
oh its been so cold
and you are so warm
big eyes
your sweat smell
skin against mine
sweet taste
in my mind
had no idea
this is what id find in you
tomorrow due to be
one of those
technicolor days-
leaves will look brighter
my life in celluloid

shinto astolat

silver footed youth
sweet in hand and eye
arc of movement undenied

courage arms grew out
blooms fell swift on your
shoulders past my castle

though my heart still cast
into tight fitted stones
begins to crack and cry

soul of water wash me down
i won't have half a version
of what could have been